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Ode to Sookie (via @JBDuRoneTB)

This is an ode to Sookie Stackhouse. Most definitely not to Sookeh.

Sookie is a strong willed woman, who is forceful yet considerate, beautiful yet modest and disabled yet without self-pity. (She considers her telepathic ability to be a mental illness)

Sookie is buxom and loves to maintain a healthy tan. She works hard at keeping her house clean. Her senses of justice, fairness and “do the right thing” are pervasive in her personal interactions. She cutely and religiously studies her Word of the Day calendar and drinks beaucoup coffee.

Sookie has a strong work ethic and is Sam’s right hand person at the bar. She is even tempered; stoic while being tortured by some fae. She balances various groups of Supes in her life and does a moderately good job of keeping them in their place in her life.

Sookie is someone I like and would like to know. She smiles brightly and often, warming the world in her glow.

Sookeh, on the other hand, is simply annoying. She is shrill, easily manipulated by various groups of Supes and rarely shows up for work. She lived in a hell hole throughout Season 3 and was more interested in neutered Weres than cleaning up.

Sookeh is prone to screaming and makes the ugliest scream face to be broadcast in HD.

“Sookeh is mahne”, Bill is famous for espousing.

You can have Sookeh, Bill.

I’ll take the charming barmaid who always seems to know when I’m ready for another cold one.

via Ode to Sookie.

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